A Flash From the Past

Once upon a time, I met a guy in secondary school; right from the first class in J.S.S 1 and for some reasons I’m yet to fully comprehend, I remember him today. Let me begin by telling you that he had quite an impact in my life despite being only a year or two older than I was.

He Was Smart
This guy either placed 1st or 2nd in class. Yes! He was that brilliant. As for me, I knew chasing such positions was never my thing so I just stuck with the usual average performance but never failed 😛

His Hands!
He had two hands just like me but from the first time I shook this guy’s hands, I knew something was wrong. It felt like I was shaking a statue or a tree. His hands were cold and hard; not the kind of hard I’ve normally felt from time to time. This was really hard. I tried again and it was just the same. I eventually discovered that his palms were naturally hard; so hard that he could take a pencil and write clearly on his palms. 😨

No One Ever Bothered Him
Well, no one wanted to get slapped by a guy whose palms felt like the table they placed their books to write on so bullies and friends alike never really bothered him and there was another reason…

He Had Strong Bones
If I didn’t know better, I would have sworn that this guy was related to the Wolverine in some way. His bones were really strong and he was physically strong. Playful games with him sometimes hurt when he accidentally hits you. We usually limited the games to the nonphysical types to cut down the chances of an accident.

He Could Fight
On this fateful day, one of the bullies in school decided to change the narrative by engaging him in a brawl. Well, it wasn’t much of a fight because it ended too fast with the bully rolling in pain on the floor and trying to hold several parts of his body at the same time. It was the first and last time he ever fought or do I say beat anyone.

He Was My Hero
He liked me for some reason and I found myself sitting next to him in class. Let me establish here that the subject I feared most in the world in secondary school was Mathematics. If all subjects were like Mathematics, I would have ended up a dropout but guess what, sitting next to this guy was a blessing. He tried to teach me and would sometimes just open up his answer sheet for me to see whenever we had a snap test or examination that involved Mathematics and the evil calculations that came with it. He rescued me from this subject on countless occasions and I wonder how I would have coped without him.

Finally…
My friend died!

Yes! Sadly, he died. We finished secondary school and moved on to chase our separate dreams and the waves of time sent us in different directions. We lost contact after some time but while I was in the tertiary institution, I ran into his brother and when I asked after him, a visible gloom emerged on his face as he told me my friend died. The cause of his death was a condition he suddenly developed, which eventually claimed his life. It hurt me more than I could have ever imagined. He never even got a chance to graduate or live life as an adult. Today, I ask God to grant my friend eternal peace and protect every single person he ever cared about in his young life. My friend’s name was Timilehin Ogunenika. As I become a year older today, I remember my friend who will never get to celebrate another birthday.
Whatever it is that you’re after or wherever you find yourself today, I want to you to know that you have something my friend will never have and that is hope. There is hope that one day, fortune will eventually smile at you and you will find something that will help you forget your struggles. Let us thank God today for the gift of life for it can be lost when we least expect it.

Wishing you all an amazing day.

Yours Truly,
Samod Biobaku

Simply SAMAD

Confession of Lagos Girl Who Has Sex With 21 Men Weekly [Simply SAMAD Exclusive +PHOTO]

Photo Credit: Pexels

*Reveals latest trends, voodoo and how men get trapped
When it comes to prostitution in Lagos, different people tend to see the ancient trade from different perspectives.

While the morally upright would hiss and curse at the sight of a ‘call girl,’ a high profile client with large appetite for carnal matters would not miss the blissful promise the nocturnal calling holds for him.

Similarly, while many would not hesitate to charge at such a lady with names like Ashawo, Karuwa or Akwuna-kwuna, depending on the individual’s cultural roots, some would rather express preference for a more refined phrase like ‘Lady of the Red Light District, commercial sex worker, whore, etc.

However, regardless of the name, the trade remains the same – sex for money. When Simply SAMAD engaged a Lagos-based call girl in a lengthy conversation, the outcome was a hive of revelations.

What started with a courteous line of sympathy eventually morphed into a three-hour-long chat between Simply SAMAD and Kemi (real names withheld).

The conversation started when she declared that she was unhappy. Asked what the matter was, Kemi said she had just lost a substantial amount of money. Excerpts:

Why are you unhappy?
I have just lost some money.

Continue reading Confession of Lagos Girl Who Has Sex With 21 Men Weekly [Simply SAMAD Exclusive +PHOTO]

Love is No Longer What It Was

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The fun, thrill and excitement that comes with having s3x with a girl for the first time was struck a fatal blow the day a girl confessed to me how she and her friends had transformed their bodies into instruments of sexual, spiritual and metaphysical bondage for any man who suffers the misfortune of having sexual intercourse with them.

                                                – Simply SAMAD

When the Cup Gets Filled

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I have seen men and women who spin a career out of concocting false tales of misfortune around their lives and milk unsuspecting people of their hard earned money. Hmmmmmm… Go ahead! One day, God might just decide to whisper an Amen to all the terrible tales of calamity of tragedy that have made you rich.

                                             – Simply SAMAD

The Devil’s Juice

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One of the things that makes an incredibly intelligent person become temporarily daft, dumb, foolish and mentally lost is the Devil’s juice; alcohol.

                                           – Samod Biobaku

When My Eyes Are Shut

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I suddenly realise that when I shut my eyes, my power of imagination leaps into a geometric level of progression that leaves me dazed for a couple of minutes.

                                           – Simply SAMAD

Look Around You

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Please no matter how tough, crazy and abysmally bad things get this week, there’s always at least one reason you should still be happy in the midst of all that madness.

                                           – Simply SAMAD

They Simply Refuse to Go Away

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There are some things in our lives that we choose to thrash but never really go away. No matter how far you hurl them, they have a way of never straying too far.

                                               – Simply SAMAD

Stop Knocking on My Door

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For some time now, the things that make me laugh have been threatened by quite a barrage of things but I will not surrender myself to the relentless knocking sound on the door of my free-spirited nature.

                                             – Simply SAMAD

Quotes & Musings of a Writer, Raconteur & Nigerian Storyteller